Perfect Vermin | a Review
originally published on 02/10/2022;
Hello everyone, I am the rat, G.E.M.Simov, a foul exterminator of vile things and of a vile nature, come to tell you about the game Perfect Vermin.
Simple review details - I rank games on an out of 10 basis, granting up to 3 points in 3 categories, as well as a last, single point from my own self, depending on my experience with it.
Gameplay
Perfect Vermin is a First-Person mallet game. It’s not a First-Person shooter, it’s a First-Person mallet game, because you (the Player) end up in control of a guy with a sledgehammer who goes around an office building, breaking down doors, chairs, desks, computers, fridges and all kinds of other things.
That’s literally it. Naturally, the goal is to break the ‘Vermin’, which are special types of… Object (furniture), even if they just look like normal objects. They are situated in spots where they should not really be, as in they’re out of place, which indicates that they are the ‘Vermin’, which you (the Player) want to crush, because that's the goal of the game.
The further the Player progresses, the more intriguing the stipulations around crushing the ‘Vermin’ become. At first, you just walk around and crush them. Then, you have a time limit of 90 seconds. Then, you are upside down. Then, you control two characters at once, though they’re in different offices. Then, you’re sideways.
These different means of spicing up the act of crushing stuff is quite interesting, due to the fact that the game’s most basic feature - its movement - is smooth and almost enjoyable to do by itself. That, coupled with the striking of the hammer, which is also quite responsive to the Player’s commands, provides a gameplay loop of seeking out stuff that’s out of place and crushing it, which gameplay loop is very good and entertaining.
The simplicity of this game winds up being incredibly good for it, though I feel as though the implementation of a jump would have been superb. With those things in mind - the fact that this game is so simple yet so splendidly perfect, leaving me with almost nothing to really want from it, I can’t stop myself from saying that it’s impressively good. 3/3
Presentation
This game looks good - that’s based off of the fact that I’d describe its appearance as cell shaded 3D of a low-poly variety that’s simultaneously very crisp and clear and somewhat detailed on top of all that. How would that be put into words, though?
Maybe it’s because it’s 3D but slightly pixelated 3D, one that’s based on blocks, but small blocks, barely noticeable for being blocks? Maybe because the shaders are just that good - that being post processing.
I can’t really go any further than what I said in my description of its visuals. All I’m saying is that it looks good. Not only that, but it looks even better. Whenever an object is broken, it falls apart into a large number of small pieces. Whenever the Player Character (PC) swings the hammer, the animation seems weighty, and the impact of the weapon/tool against whatever it is that winds up hit is powerful and satisfying.
The way certain things spread all over the office, the way the sounds are mixed in with everything else, the way the music (or lack thereof) fills the scene with… With emotion, with meaning… It’s really good.
The visuals of this game, and the way it is presented, are fantastic. I can say that because even the tutorial is fantastic. It is integrated so seamlessly into the game that I’ve barely any reason to spoil it, but I will.
The game starts off with the PC in an elevator. The elevator doors open and what is visible to the Player from within the elevator is a floating prompt - WASD to move. The Player uses the WASD keys to move, walking out of the elevator, ending up in a room with a single door (and the elevator). The Player walks up to the door and a prompt appears over the door, urging the Player to interact through the use of the Left Mouse Button… At which point the hammer appears, swinging, breaking down the door.
Now the Player knows exactly what’s what. There’s a number at the top left of the screen and when the Player crushes a Vermin, the number goes down with 1. That shows the Player what needs to be done. It’s great!
In addition to that, the appearances by the newscaster are great for the conveyance of the story. 3/3
Story
Now, this part of the game is simultaneously its strongest suit and its weakest link. On the one hand, the entirety of the game works flawlessly as a means of flowing into the story (the conclusion of which is very impressive), but the story itself does not seem that important or worthwhile. There seems to be no great message, other than maybe the importance of viewpoint or time.
I will not be spoiling this story. The game is cheap and is very fun, and the tale it tells is worth experiencing, so go ahead and do that. I’ll just say that the visual means through which the story is told, the things that hint at what truly is, as well as the weight of what is being spoken of… Those are all quite well done.
Unfortunately, I feel as though something was lacking. As though something is there when there’s no need for it to be there, as though something just does not add up. 2/3
Legendary Point
Does this game get the legendary point, so craved and wanted by all and none at the same time? I feel as though it should, but… The answer is actually NO. The thing that was missing, I think, was really prominent in leaving its impression on me. In addition to that, dealing with some of the achievements was way more bothersome than it should have been, so I’m docking points for that.
I mean, sure, the secret area is a secret area, but how come it is such because it requires the stars’ alignment to wind up being accessible? 0/1
Conclusion
8/10. An impressively good little game that will keep you entertained for as long as you may need to be entertained. Not only that, but the price-tag it carries is quite forgiving, and the message it wields might provoke you to think. I’d suggest it to everyone except folks who are quite squeamish.
I tuck it under my belt, another shining achievement that I proudly display. Good stuff, frankly.