Brotato | a Review

originally published on 18/05/2024; Hello everyone, I am the mobile potato, G.E.M.Simov, a vegetable so flexible it can walk, and I am here to tell you about “Brotato”. Simple review details - I rank games on an out of 10 basis, granting up to 3

Idle Spiral | a Review

originally published on 23/04/2024; Hello everyone, I am the achiever of perpetual motion, G.E.M.Simov, a spinning doodad kinda dude, here to tell you about the game “Idle Spiral”. Simple review details - I rank games on an out of 10 basis, granting up to 3

Breath of Death VII | a Review

originally published on 18/04/2024; Hello everyone, I am the witness of Cthulhu’s rescue of the world, G.E.M.Simov, a man so befuddled and yet familiar with this developer that I’ve come back to haunt their dreams and tell YOU about “Breath of Death VII”

DungeonLand | a Review

originally published on 13/03/2024; Hello everyone, I am the extravagant business magnate, G.E.M.Simov, a man so insane I have decided to make a theme park themed on dungeons, and today I will tell you all about “DungeonLand”. Simple review details - I rank games on

CLONES! | a Review

originally published on 26/02/2024; Hello everyone, I am the one and only, totally unique, G.E.M.Simov, a person definitely not sporting a couple of clones in some funky lab, here to tell you about the game “CLONES!” (henceforth just Clones). Simple review details - I rank

Castle Crashers | a Review

originally published on 14/02/2024; Hello everyone, I am the crasher of castles, G.E.M.Simov, a goon that knows the olden times, here to tell you about the game “Castle Crashers”. Simple review details - I rank games on an out of 10 basis, granting up to

Away: Journey to the Unexpected | a Review

originally published on 05/02/2024; Hello everyone, I am the never-expected G.E.M.Simov, a being of total surprise, here to tell you about “Away: Journey to the Unexpected” (Henceforth just Away). Simple review details - I rank games on an out of 10 basis, granting up to

Peace, Death! | A Review

originally published on 20/01/2024; Hello everyone, I am the not-yet-dead G.E.M.Simov, a fellow that’s more in tune with death than with life, here to tell you about the game: “Peace, Death!”. Simple review details - I rank games on an out of 10 basis,

I love you, colonel Sanders! A finger lickin’ good dating simulator | a Review

originally published on 13/01/2024; Hello everyone, I am the reserved KFC enjoyer, G.E.M.Simov, a goon that only eats KFC once every three months, if not rarer, here to tell you about the funky advertisement/game: “I love you, colonel Sanders! A finger lickin’ good dating

Hunger Dungeon | a Review

originally published on 09/01/2024; Hello everyone, I am the perpetually peckish G.E.M.Simov, a goon with unknowable motivations, come to tell you about the game “Hunger Dungeon”. Simple review details - I rank games on an out of 10 basis, granting up to 3 points in